Sunday, January 28, 2007

How can I Live....

Without a washing machine? I have four children, three of whom are boys...and my washing machine is leaking, as was the drain pipe. My One Tru Love isn't feeling well, so he is grumpy and mad that the washing machine decided to start to leak. Fourtunately, we found that the drain pipe thingy was leaking (for a while apparently) because of the washer leaking. I know, it probably doesn't make sense, but...at any rate...I am without a washing machine, and school tomorrow! I guess I'm making a run to the laundry mat. Lucky me.
I guess I should get used to life not being easy. It seems like there are monkey wrenches thrown in all of the time. If it's not some appliance, or hot water pipe, it's the car. I swear...it never ends. Ever. I wonder why we can't ever get ahead....that's why...it's always something. I'm whining I know, but, it just gets so old.
Back to the whole rigamarole tomorrow. Lucky for me and my finances, the boys guitar teacher is on his honeymoon, and we have no class, that will save me about $100. I really need it right now. But, back to the homework and getting up early, and fighting kids, and hopefully I will have a washing machine again...because did I mention...it's broken! I am more than a little stressed out about that.
Oh, I was reading Prevention magazine thing in the line at the grocery store today, and they were so kind as to tell me why I have a fat belly. It's because I am stressed. I'm not peri or post menopausal, too young for that, don't have high triglycerides or high blood pressure (actually, the blood pressure is low...go figure), but I am stressed. I guess, according to this very helpful (ha ha) article. All I need to do is find time for myself. Yeah right. That will stress me out as much as not having time for myself. It's just something else to do. I guess I'm in a whiny, victim mood this evening.
It just feels like life is rolling over me right now. It's a bit disheartening. But, look at the brightside. Payday is coming! Oh, but that will be gone before it gets here anyway.
Yep, I am DEFINITELY whining.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

And it goes on....

I have such a busy life. I feel like I am running in a hundred different directions at once. I really question my own sanity at times like this. This week has become the week from the Nether World (my New Year's resolution was to clean up my potty mouth). It's only Tuesday. I wish it were Friday. I feel like the days are lasting forever. There is so much to be done and not enough hours in the day to get it done. I'm having a hard time fitting in the fun stuff.
I have a 10 year old melting down before my very eyes, and I am fresh out of energy. I work with kids all day. I have to deal with their behavior and help them make good choices. Sometimes, I just want to leave work at work. But, I have children, so I work at my "job" 24/7. I just want to be off sometimes. What is off? When you're a mom....is there an off? I am getting tired and burnt out. Not really from my job that I get paid money for, but from my babies. My darlin' little angels. The bickering, the fighting, the melting down, the dinners, the lunches, the homework, the classes, etc., is wearing me thin. I was looking at vacations online, and dreaming of being independently wealthy. Having the means to book a two day vacation to Vegas for next weekend, just because I want to. Reality says, that is impossible. I have four kids, housework, work, and bills to pay...not happening anytime soon.
I'm working on booking a flight for my daughter. We were unable to pay for the Washington D.C. trip that the 8th graders go on, so, my aunt who has no grandchildren (not by her or her children's choices), has invited her down to LA for the week to visit Disneyland, the beach, Hollywood, etc. She is ecstatic, I am jealous.
I am just beyond...what I don't know. I just know I am beyond. I was invited to a movie night with some coworkers, but, I lack the energy to go out. I left my house at 7:35 AM and didn't get home from my job, my children and my life, until 5:45. Fortunately, our cook at school gave me leftovers and there was enough to feed my family dinner, so that was one less thing I had to do...but, laundry was waiting. So, as I write this, I am listening for the buzz of the washing machine so that I can do the laundry shuffle. It really never ends. There are dishes piled high in the sink, the living room is a mess, and my 14 year old is asking me about the XYZ Affair. No clue. Goodness, I am really ready to cuddle up in my bed and relax...
Oh, and on top of all this stuff...CRAMPS! ARGH! I guess that's what makes it 100 times worse.

Friday, January 19, 2007

What a week!

What a week I have had. Holy cow. With four kids going in four different directions and trying to maintain some sort of sanity for myself...I don't even know how to end that sentence. What a week. That about sums up my feelings at the present moment.
The week began smoothly and calmly enough. Monday was a day off of school and work. It was a relatively enjoyable day. My mom came down to visit for the day. I really enjoyed spending time with her. It seems like we just don't spend enough time together. The kids all were doing one thing or another, but it was a nice easygoing day. Then Tuesday hit. With a vengence. Work and school began again and all the fun that goes with that. T had guitar after school. Fortunately, the meeting previously scheduled for Tuesday was postponed to Wednesday...which solved quite a few logistics problems for me. But, I was exhausted after a long day at work. I took my son to guitar and decided to make a quick run to Salvation Army to donate some clothes and then race back to wait for him to finish up. Errand accomplished in record time, I decided to spend the remaining 20 minutes of his lesson reading a fascinating book I recently bought. Paradise Alley is the title and I am thoroughly enjoying it, and desperately wishing I had more than 10 to 20 minute snippets to read it in. At any rate, I opened my book, to relax, listen to a bit of music, and read, when I felt my eyes getting heavy. I decided to lay my head back for "just a minute". Next thing I know, T is opening the car door ever so gently, and timidly saying "Mom?" My eyes flew open. T's lesson was over. I had fallen asleep! He tells me as we are driving away that when he walked around the corner and saw me with my head back, eyes closed and mouth open, that he got scared and was afraid that I was dead! He's 12 and a bit on the melodramatic side. We got a good laugh out of that one, and I got a power nap!
Wednesday was ever so busy, with the meeting I attended that stretched to one and a half hours. Raced home to get some dinner made and to dash my 12 year old to youth group. Then to good ol' Wally world for the necessities, then back to pick T up from church and rush home to finish up homework.
Thursday...Pizza night, and who is heading up the bake sale? Yep, you guessed it...me. So, I was home all of 40 minutes before I had to rush over to Round Table to sit at a table being tempted by cookies and brownies, all the while shelling quarters out to my three boys like there's no tomorrow. It was a fun night (it always is) but another late one!
Then today. Friday. My easy day. Yeah right. Work in the morning. Pick the boys up at noon. Out to lunch. Take C to a friend's house. Home for all of 1 hour then off to band practice for T. Took M to Toys R Us to spend the last of his Christmas money. Back to pick T up from band. Run to the post office, stand in line forever, only to find they lost the letter I am there to pick up. Over to pick C up from his friends house. Home. Run to store to pick up a few things for dinner. Back home to eat and relax. And now, it's almost midnight and I can't sleep. I think I'm over tired or something, that or My One Tru Love's snoring is affecting my ability to sleep peacefully. Hmm.
At least tomorrow is Saturday. Let's see what's on the agenda...nail appointment for me (my one true luxury) and then a hair appointment for me...then nothing except laundry. I'm holding out to keep it that busy...I think that I have a date with My One Tru Love on the books for tomorrow night. Hmm, I think I can handle that.